Nuked London Hatriots
The Nuked London Hatriots are one of the teams in Mutant Football League. The team is a parody of the New England Patriots although the team in this case is based in England rather than Massachusetts. The roster has every race in the game so far. Their symbol is a yellow mutant with red hair wearing a gas mask. Their stadium is Phlegmbly Stadium situated in Ground Zero, London and is a parody of Wembley Stadium, one of the NFL's venues for the league's London Games.
The Hatriots have won numerous Mayhem Bowl Championships. Their assassin Quarterback, Bomb Shady is arguably the best to ever play the game. All-Star Throb Bronkowski is his #1 target. The Hatriots have a rampaging defense, which easily shuts down opposing offenses. Their coach, Swill Belchstuff is a brilliant tactician, he plans for every situation possible and when that doesn't work - he cheats. (Mutant Football League, Team Scouting)
Theme[edit | edit source]
On the Grid by Brian Schmidt
All-Stars[edit | edit source]
- Bomb Shady
- #12 Quarterback
- Throb Bronkowski
- #87 Bruise Receiver
- Demon McThwarty
- #32 Safety
- Falcon Rupture
- #21 Cover back
- Dante Firepower
- #54 Line Basher
OVERALL: 91
- Offense: 90
- Defense: 90
- Special Teams: 92
Dirty Tricks[edit | edit source]
Offense:
Defense:
- Ginormous
- QB Sack Attack (pre-Mayhem Bowl update)
- Thunderclap
Player Stats[edit | edit source]
Offense:
Quarterbacks
Player Name | Race | Overall | Throwing Velocity (TVC) | Short Accuracy Throwing (SAC) | Deep Accuracy Throwing (DAC) | Throwing Power (THP) | Intelligence (INT) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Bomb Shady* | Skeleton | 96 | 85 | 100 | 100 | 100 | 100 |
Doc Eyebender | Robot | 68 | 65 | 79 | 67 | 82 | 79 |
Ya'Homie Brisket | Skeleton | 54 | 56 | 74 | 60 | 58 | 57 |
Prying Voyeur | Robot | 70 | 60 | 85 | 73 | 81 | 69 |
Hoardin Goreblood | Skeleton | 64 | 60 | 86 | 67 | 74 | 64 |
Running Backs
Player Name | Race | Overall | Route Running (RTE) | Break Tackles(BT) | Hands/Ability to not Fumble (HND) | Catching (CTH) | Speed (SPD) | Toughness (TGH) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Neon Spewis | Skeleton | 86 | 100 | 86 | 91 | 84 | 77 | 94 |
Hex Bulkhead | Human | 73 | 88 | 77 | 78 | 91 | 72 | 69 |
Insane Flight | Robot | 79 | 100 | 81 | 71 | 94 | 82 | 56 |
Claw Hammer | Human | 63 | 84 | 69 | 53 | 84 | 62 | 53 |
Spike Killslee | Orc | 78 | 91 | 86 | 85 | 91 | 68 | 91 |
Receivers
Player Name | Race | Overall | Route Running (RTE) | Catching (CTH) | Vertical/Jumping (VER) | Speed (SPD) | Intelligence (INT) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Goulian Metalman | Robot | 92 | 100 | 100 | 92 | 83 | 94 |
Branded Crooks | Alien | 90 | 100 | 86 | 100 | 100 | 76 |
Falcon Missle | Robot | 70 | 63 | 71 | 84 | 82 | 68 |
Brisk Chokem | Human | 86 | 100 | 90 | 94 | 84 | 85 |
Bustin Bitchwood | Skeleton | 72 | 84 | 84 | 83 | 76 | 50 |
Wrathspew Hater | Skeleton | 58 | 50 | 72 | 62 | 62 | 55 |
Fanny Abdomen | Human | 78 | 94 | 84 | 84 | 72 | 74 |
Bruise Receivers
Player Name | Race | Overall | Route Running (RTE) | Catching (CTH) | Vertical/Jumping (VER) | Speed (SPD) | Intelligence (INT) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Throb Bronkowski* | Orc | 94 | 100 | 100 | 73 | 69 | 92 |
Cartellus Slammit | Orc | 72 | 71 | 88 | 65 | 56 | 64 |
Inpain Talon | Robot | 59 | 67 | 74 | 63 | 59 | 63 |
Willtz | Skeleton | 68 | 84 | 86 | 50 | 50 | 61 |
Guards
Player Name | Race | Overall | Pass Blocking (PBK) | Run Blocking (RBK) | Downfield Blocking (DBK) | Intelligence (INT) | Toughness (TGH) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Spaz Raven | Orc | 92 | 95 | 100 | 100 | 91 | 90 |
Carcass Slammen | Orc | 96 | 100 | 97 | 100 | 100 | 97 |
Hated Manbruise | Orc | 94 | 97 | 100 | 100 | 98 | 97 |
Hate Soldier | Robot | 76 | 76 | 94 | 76 | 66 | 96 |
Bro Looney-Bin | Human | 68 | 86 | 69 | 78 | 64 | 71 |
Mole Bossin | Human | 72 | 84 | 78 | 83 | 66 | 75 |
Defense:
Blitzers
Player Name | Race | Overall | Block Shedding (BSH) | Tackling (TAK) | Hitting Power (POW) | Pass Deflection (DEF) | Toughness (TGH) | Blitzing (BLZ) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Falcon Frown | Orc | 90 | 100 | 100 | 94 | 81 | 84 | 97 |
Torment Die | Human | 87 | 94 | 100 | 86 | 83 | 88 | 94 |
Slay Dour | Robot | 85 | 88 | 93 | 84 | 84 | 88 | 100 |
Sinscent Brokenspine | Robot | 74 | 82 | 79 | 75 | 64 | 88 | 85 |
Chasm Stench | Orc | 77 | 89 | 91 | 85 | 73 | 75 | 78 |
MoCrash Harsh | Human | 70 | 80 | 81 | 67 | 76 | 67 | 89 |
Enforcers
Player Name | Race | Overall | Block Shedding (BSH) | Tackling (TAK) | Hitting Power (POW) | Pass Deflection (DEF) | Aggressiveness (AGR) | Blitzing (BLZ) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Tormental Slimbebeast | Orc | 92 | 100 | 91 | 100 | 82 | 87 | 100 |
Nightmaresinside | Skeleton | 72 | 73 | 79 | 73 | 71 | 72 | 83 |
Grave Guiltyman | Skeleton | 74 | 72 | 82 | 73 | 72 | 75 | 84 |
Cover Backs
Player Name | Race | Overall | Man Coverage (MCV) | Intelligence (INT) | Tackling (TAK) | Vertical/Jumping (VER) | Speed (SPD) | Pass Deflection (DEF) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Falcon Rupture* | Robot | 96 | 100 | 100 | 100 | 91 | 88 | 100 |
Demon Killmore | Robot | 88 | 95 | 99 | 100 | 84 | 84 | 82 |
Virus Clones | Robot | 73 | 87 | 62 | 77 | 81 | 81 | 72 |
Brwonson Badbrosil | Skeleton | 72 | 85 | 77 | 78 | 75 | 68 | 74 |
Cleric Dough | Skeleton | 76 | 100 | 70 | 82 | 71 | 68 | 82 |
Gromlathon Groans | Skeleton | 73 | 82 | 67 | 82 | 72 | 63 | 87 |
Line Bashers
Player Name | Race | Overall | Man Coverage (MCV) | Block Shedding (BSH) | Intelligence (INT) | Tackling (TAK) | Hitting Power (POW) | Pass Deflection (DEF) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Wild Van Noise | Human | 76 | 87 | 83 | 83 | 83 | 75 | 65 |
Abandon Clobber | Skeleton | 86 | 100 | 94 | 87 | 95 | 90 | 94 |
Shy McLemon | Human | 58 | 78 | 51 | 63 | 63 | 44 | 70 |
War Hammer | Human | 76 | 77 | 88 | 86 | 92 | 65 | 78 |
Rabid Hairless | Orc | 70 | 88 | 67 | 47 | 94 | 84 | 77 |
Dante Firepower* | Robot | 92 | 96 | 93 | 100 | 100 | 85 | 84 |
Safeties
Player Name | Race | Overall | Man Coverage (MCV) | Intelligence (INT) | Tackling (TAK) | Vertical/Jumping (VER) | Speed (SPD) | Pass Deflection (DEF) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Demon McThwarty | Robot | 93 | 94 | 100 | 100 | 94 | 88 | 93 |
Turd Burglar | Alien | 70 | 83 | 71 | 78 | 76 | 67 | 70 |
Ruin Harden | Robot | 79 | 88 | 94 | 92 | 72 | 59 | 81 |
Fatrick Tongue | Skeleton | 78 | 92 | 84 | 87 | 77 | 80 | 73 |
Hate Bender | Human | 65 | 71 | 66 | 71 | 67 | 65 | 69 |
Special Teams:
Kickers
Player Name | Race | Overall | Onsides Kicking (OSK) | Kicking Accuracy (KAC) | Kicking Power (KPW) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
BleedIt KickItOutski | Human | 100 | 100 | 100 | 100 |
Punters
Player Name | Race | Overall | Punting Accuracy (PAC) | Punt Hangtime (HNG) | Punting Power (PPW) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
Lion Talon | Skeleton | 93 | 93 | 100 | 97 |
Burn Returners
Player Name | Race | Overall | Break Tackles (BT) | Catching (CTH) | Speed (SPD) | Hands/Ability to not Fumble (HND) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Gutsy Spills | Robot | 88 | 92 | 94 | 91 | 81 |
Trivia[edit | edit source]
Player References
- Line Basher War Hammer is a reference to Warhammer.
Team Trivia
- Acording to Urban Dictionary, a hatriot is person who zealously supports his/her political dogma to the point of bigotry towards people of opposing opinions.
- It is also a caller to The David Pakman Show who records "Hatriot Mail" comments expressing his/her ultra-conservative views in a derogatory manner.
- The word shares the same name with a thrash metal band from Oakland, California.
- Their kicker BleedIt KickItOutski is the only non-star player to have a perfect 100 across all stats.
See also[edit | edit source]
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